"b rakfast" brought to you by Me channelinng Anthony Bourdains cynical wit

"b rakfast" or breakfast to you. The eventful start of the morning filled with savory pastries if you live in France, eggs, bacon, sausage, and biscuits if it's Sunday and you live in most parts of America. Or you could be our family, like many Americans who eat instant oatmeal or crusty cereal for breakfast, my family does the same, except on sundays when we "forget" (grr) to go to church and then my mom serves me what starving Africans would consider a hearty meal; one egg and overcooked slabs of bacon...yum....

I LOATH breakfast 'with a passion'. Maybe its because I have never had a decent one unless it consisted of all carbs (I love me some carbs). Waffles, pancakes, could I at least get a biscuit? I mean I have had the frozen crap (excuse my French*) every day if I'm not having cereal or a smoothie(the best brekfast I've had all summer, and thats not an insult, they are gooood!), or a protein bar *gags*. I just never found a fancy for many breakfast proteans. I don't like bacon (as I havent had decent bacon) but I semi-like sausage (not those gross tiny ones but a big spicy italian one!) and egfgs I only eat the white...I'm pathetically picky as a five year old..when it comes to breakfast.

I'm hungry! So I go through all the shelves, cabinets, and fridges/freezers in the house to find the only thing I could make with little or no effort was microwave pancakes. I know I had fallen but I had to give it a try. They looked okay but when they had done there time in the microwave I could see that all that was holding then together was preservitives. One Word. Expired (and just plain gross). So I continued my search.

I'm not very good at just throwing things together with what I have in the kitchen yet. Mostly because I don't trust myself. so I was looking for somethink to make with the limited stuff we have in the kitchen. At this piont I already got a job so I felt free to smear QFCs good name by saying it sucks and is not worth the prices. Unfortunatly it's the only dang store close enough to my house so we throw away cash on such small amounts of food you would think we were going through a food shortage and we could only go by rations!

Then I saw the rice cooker and in my insane pleas for carbs I went with it. Rice for breakfast...yea...they do it in many parts of the world...like Japan where they don't go a day without it... then I remembered a recipe I never did from long ago in ages past; La Bouillie (Africa). Its pretty much rice with peanut butter but I thought I would give it a try so while I looked for the recipe I came across a crepe recipe. Of course, crepes! So I started to get out ingredients when I realized...no eggs...AGAIN...my house is infamous for not haveing any eggs because my rotten family can never remember to save some eggs for when I have to EAT! wow I'm channeling a very angsty teen right now...anyway crepes were out because of the eggs problem...the fridge should always have eggs! Without exception! Arggrgagragragar!

So we were back to rice and I wan't upset about it I was looking forward to the simplistic experience. I also figured I could try that rice cooker bread after I cleaned the cooker out then I had an epiphany! I already had one but you know where I'm going wiuth this! Yes! I could try going a day ith only using my rice cooker to make my meals! I would start with the peanut rice then go to the bread then, then....hmmm if I can find a decent source for cooking chicken and such in a rice cooker I would be set!


so this is what I ended up with.... ^#%&*^#%(& Thats for you Anthony